If ‘JobKeeper’ was an assignment…
July 12, 2020
Teacher (ATO): [Monday 20th April] Here’s your assignment (JobKeeper). You will have VERY LIMITED TIME to complete it. I haven’t given you all the details just yet, but have a go. I will give you updates over the coming days. It will take twice as long as you think and your classmates (clients) will have lots of questions and be relying on you to get it done. If you plagiarise (do dodgy shit) you will be subject to heavy penalties, maybe even imprisonment. It is due by 30 April (wage payments to be made). How does that sound?
Student (Accountant): [Monday 27th to Wednesday 22nd April]
*works crazy, long ass days on assignment (JobKeeper)*
*Still confused due to missing/inadequate assignment information*
*works on other assignments (super deadlines)*
Teacher (ATO): [Thursday 23rd April] Here’s that information you’ve been waiting on (alternative test). Hope that helps.
Student (Accountant): [Monday 23rd April]
Teacher (ATO): [Friday 24th April 9pm] Here is some more information (One in, all in rule). Oh, and I changed some things that you and your classmates (clients) will need to review and apply correctly (full time students aged 16 & 17 year olds eligibility). But don’t worry, just keep the work you’ve done the same, but change everything else from now on.
*spends entire weekend on assignment (Jobkeeper) with very little break, rest or recovery*
*calls classmates (clients) to discuss changes*
Teacher (ATO): [Monday 27th April] I change my mind. Even though you’ve worked so over last week and weekend, I’m changing the due date from 30 April to 8 May…
Student (Accountant): [Monday 27th April]
*throws paper in the air and storms out*